You Are Not a Man Trainer

Recover-From-A-Bad-Break-Up-Woman-Chasing-Her-Man-300x199There comes a moment at the end of a relationship when women feel like they made the man ready for the next woman. Other times women don’t want to let go of a man because they feel like they put a lot of work in him and they do not want another woman to reap the benefits. The reason this looming feeling paralyzes us sometimes is because after a relationship (usually long term) when it ends, the man quickly matches up with someone else and gives her everything you think he should have given you. Here is the truth.

While you may have thought you needed to “train” him to do certain things, it was his choice to do it or not. It isn’t that after being with you he realized everything he did wrong and decided to start over with someone else, perhaps someone else made what you optioned him for as requirement, if he wanted her badly enough. What does that mean? It means, if you never said anything or let his foolishness continue such as promoting marriage but never really did anything to make him want it or you as much as you did, why would he try? The next person was likely upfront about her wants and needs and said either all or nothing and he chose all.

kelsey_1794140cA lot of times, men who jump quickly into relationships right after the next and give the woman everything he should have given you is likely trying to make up for his own insecurities and anger at himself. Men feel embarrassed and disappointed like we do when long term relationship ends. They may not show it but they feel that shit. Instead of figuring himself out and cleaning up his act, it is better to cover it up with someone new to give the impression he is doing just fine but it is likely he is still the same scumbag you let go.

If you want something from a man be clear about it. If he isn’t making moves towards getting it done, let him go. IF he jumps on the next woman’s bus (Stevie J lol) almost immediately, know for sure now it wasn’t you it was him trying to find something in himself in someone else. This is a lost person that you can live without.

SMH at this TV….


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