Oh Crap He Cheated

tumblr_m4tn7mkjhh1rss8soo2_r2_400One of the biggest betrayals a man can commit is by sleeping with someone else. What makes it so hurtful is the reasoning behind it. For men, they can sleep with someone and it be nothing and still love you like they did the day before, which for some women is forgivable. But when they are sleeping with the same person over and over until they get caught, they may as well shove their fist in our chest, rip out our hearts and throw it out the window.

Both scenarios of a man cheating are painful. I personally don’t care if it was a drunken one night stand or a longer term bang, cheating is wrong. For those women, who say cheating is inevitable and all men do it, they believe that because they haven’t been with a man who hasn’t cheated on them. It’s almost like a camouflage belief to protect themselves. If I say it and believe it, it won’t hurt if it happens. Even if you believed all men cheat, you are still going to hurt when and if it does happen. You are what you believe.

If women could handle cheating without a problem, we wouldn’t have shows like Snapped or When Women Kill on TV. (Love those shows by the way) Women wouldn’t carry such a cloud over them and be so angry if they could handle it. The amount of pain a woman feels when she has been betrayed is something I don’t know if men really understand. We are angrier at the other woman because she does or should understand that pain and she involved herself in another woman’s pain because she was being selfish. There goes woman nation… smh.

tumblr_mnqjwmf1S11qmromro1_500Coping with a man cheating and moving on with or without him, takes healing. It may take you getting some space from the relationship to clear your head. When you are married and if children are involved it is different, it’s harder. That doesn’t mean you don’t get the space you need. Getting over betrayal is not something that’s easy and if you do not deal with it, it will manifest inside you and grow into something ugly.

Women who have been married for 20 years plus and have dealt with a cheating man will always tell you not to walk away when you are emotional. Give yourself time to clear your head and then decide if he is someone you want. I want to repeat this, DO NOT DO ANYTHING WHEN YOU ARE EMOTIONAL. Take as long as you need to grieve, scream, curse him out, kick him, but refrain from using weapons or being overly violent. Jail is not the boujie way! Get over the shock and decide where you want to go when your emotions are not so raw.

Sending out some love to a friend…


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